SERIOUSLY?! 4 weeks left? You have GOT to be kidding me.
Don't get me wrong, in no way am I prepared for Cash to make an appearance. I still have to put together his room, do laundry, pack my hospital bag and write a ton of thank you notes (everyone has been so generous). Not to mention he still has some baking to do. But that doesn't mean that physically I'm not ready. As I sit here typing Cash is creeping up further into my rib cage making it hard to breathe. Later I'm sure he will tap his foot to the radio, elbow my side, head butt my bladder, and scratch at my cervix...all in a days work for him. Physically I am ready. Done. Tapped out. My clothes are getting shorter and shorter while my belly gets wider. The level of uncomfortable increases each day. Really I ask you: how can your feet ache first thing in the morning?! Literally the first few steps each morning are painful. On the flip side; I could be aching in other places or not getting any sleep. Its a trade off.
It has now gotten to the point where the most common question used to be "when's your due date?" and now its "when's your last day of work?" and "have you picked a name yet?" To which I reply "whenever the water breaks." and "no names until I see the baby in person." Don't get me wrong, these are all logical and very reasonable questions....
Thanks to:
my gigantic belly (slight exaggeration)
my tiny/uncomfortable work chair (it only seems that way when I'm pregnant)
summer desk job (summer=no kids=no activities=boring)
and 103 degree weather
I now suffer from "low back pain, squished uterus, restless fetus, and swollen limb syndrome" (See pregnant)
And for these reasons I can HUG my amazing Dr (or 15, seeing as I'm a Kaiser patient) for putting me on "modified work duty" (i.e I only work 4 out of 5 days a week.)
So for the last two weeks I've been trying to relax and stay off my feet (per Dr's orders). The problem is this technically sets me back because in reality I should start walking now and not turn back until I'm fully dilated, something I like to call "Forest-Gumping-It."
And if I was to leave work at the four week mark (like now) as some women do, my day would look something like it did this past Monday:
7 am: wake up, breakfast in bed with Jake, take him to school
8 am: make smoothie and english muffin, watch Real Housewives of NYC and NJ
10 am: nap
12 pm: peddle around in baby's room, make a bigger mess than necessary, think about doing laundry
1 pm: make 32 oz milk shake and panini. Eat with Ruffles and onion dip.
1:15 pm: catch up on SYTYCD
3 pm: convince Zach to blow up my floatie so I can lounge in the pool, wrestle into unflattering bathing suit
3:20 pm: float in pool
4 pm: "sweep" backyard
4:10 pm: float in pool
6 pm: slop together some kind of dinner
7 pm: lather, rinse, repeat
8 pm: due to total exhaustion crawl into bed and doze off while watching movie
Now see, I realize this sounds totally amazing (and it was) but it's completely unconducive to coaxing a baby to come out sooner rather than later. And this is the only reason I'll be at work until the very end. Waddling from the parking lot to the office, sweating like a beast, and making dramatic noises as Cash swims laps in my uterus.
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